You’re in the thick of wedding planning-choosing vendors, decor, guests. It’s time to assemble your bridal party dream team…but how do you decide who makes the cut? Choosing your bridal party can sometimes feel as important as choosing your partner. It’s no small task—feelings can get hurt, family dynamics come into play, and you’re left wondering if your childhood BFF will get along with your college roommate or if someone will have an issue walking down the aisle with a stranger. Don’t worry; I’ve got you covered with some tips to help you make the best choices with as little stress as possible. 

Start With the Basics

Before you start assigning roles, let’s take a deep breath and think about your wedding vibe. Is it a large event or a small, intimate gathering? Your bridal party should align with the tone of your day. For instance, a smaller wedding might call for just a maid of honor and best man, while a larger celebration could accommodate a full squad of bridesmaids and groomsmen. Keep in mind, the more people in your bridal party means more accommodations for schedules, more opinions on wedding details, and of course more expenses. I have noticed in the last few years that bridal party numbers have been smaller-less than 5 people per side. 

Prioritize Relationships

Think about the people who mean the most to you and your partner. When you choose your bridal party, it should consist of those you genuinely want by your side on this special day. These are the friends and family who will cheer you on, keep you calm, and maybe even hold your dress while you pee (true friendship, right?).

Ask yourself:

• Who has been there for you through thick and thin?
• Who makes you feel supported and loved?
• Who will help make your wedding planning journey fun rather than stressful?

Don’t Feel Obligated

Just because someone asked you to be in their wedding doesn’t mean you’re required to choose them. Same goes for family members—while it’s nice to include siblings or cousins, it’s not mandatory. Remember, this is your day, and you shouldn’t feel like you are choosing based on obligation. Choose your bridal party wisely. 

Consider Personalities and Dynamics

Your bridal party will be spending a lot of time together, so think about how they’ll get along. Look, they don’t need to be besties. But taking personalities and history into consideration is important. If there’s a history of tension between members of the party, you might want to rethink having them both in the group. I can’t tell you how many stories I’ve heard of people saying they will behave just to cause drama within the group. Before you choose your bridal party, keep this in mind. 

Set Expectations Early

Once you’ve made your list, have honest conversations with your chosen bridal party members. Let them know what’s involved—time commitments, financial responsibilities, and any special roles they might need to take on. This transparency will help avoid misunderstandings down the line and it will avoid you feeling let down by your party. Are you hoping they will go dress/tux shopping with you? Do you want them just to show up? These conversations are SOO important to avoiding unnecessary drama. Communicate all expectations before you choose your bridal party. 

Don’t Overthink It

At the end of the day, your bridal party is there to support, celebrate and be there for you. There’s nothing saying you need a certain number of people or specific roles. If having a smaller or non-traditional bridal party feels right, go for it! This is your chance to create a wedding experience that reflects you and your partner. Also, PLEASE do not stress about having the same number of people on each side. This gets brought up so often that I like to reassure couples it is one of those things you won’t even notice in the photos or on the day of. Avoid adding people that you don’t really want for the sake of uniformity. 

Bonus Tip: Trust Your Gut

When in doubt, go with your instincts. If someone immediately comes to mind when you think of your special day, that’s probably a sign they belong in your bridal party. Always trust your instincts when you choose your bridal party.

Final Thoughts

Choosing your bridal party can feel daunting, but it’s also an opportunity to surround yourself with the people who love and uplift you. Trust yourself, communicate openly, and don’t sweat the small stuff. Your wedding day is about celebrating love—and the people who matter most will be cheering you on, whether they’re standing by your side or sitting in the audience.

Now go forth and assemble your crew! You’ve got this!